no, I dont have pride...

Have you ever turned your ipod onto 'shuffle' and the songs miraculously tell the story of your life , or at least the story of your current life...
My playlist today .
Dido - Dont think of me
Jonny Z - no senor
ditty bops - there's a girl
pink - just like a pill
portishead - wanderingstar
corrine bailey rae - trouble sleeping
lenka - anything I'm not
beastie boys - brass monkey
metallica - the call of ktulu
milli vanilli - i'm gonna miss you
corinne bailey rae - choux pastry heart
pearl jam - garden
skee lo - i wish
the donnas - have you no pride
sybil - dont make me over
alanis morrisette - hand in my pocket

ok, well maybe its not quite my current life story, but its pretty close, and its just fun to share my music mix of the day.
and here are the lyrics to
"Have you no pride"

Shoe gazers in blazers
Introduce you to razors, so that
The Wilson twins- they can see you
In all your glory, in all your glory

[Chorus:]
Don't you care what all the people say
You don't care you're gonna do it any way
All eyes are on you and they're burning holes till
There's no one left inside
Have you no pride

How many pairs do you own
How many patches have you
sewn on your sleeve
Now don't you dare mend the holes
They tell your story yeah tell your story
(sell your story)

[Chorus]

What do you write in that journal
Some kind of infernal poetry
So that I'll offer my help
But don't you worry, don't you worry

[Chorus]

Let's take a walk through the crowd
Let's take a walk through the crowd

holding the vision

They see something in me that I sometimes forget that I have. They see my good-ness. That must be why they love me... my crew, tribe, lovies, community. They have seen, heard and share, my intentions, so when I forget they can remind me.
*being real with people, being in joy with people, being a supportive tribe, living-working-playing together...
I find myself being spiraled into this vortex of community within community. Intermingling with ecovillages, families, tribes, poets, dancers, and gardeners in Eugene; getting more immersed in many circles of friends; creating even more trust and openness with even more people who have a similar vision; people who have similar goals and ideals and are working towards making it happen.
Outside of my happy little vortex, I see lots of craziness. I am peeping out, knowing that if I stick my head out too far, I could get swooped into the crazy vortex at any moment.
but I have an idea
If we keep picturing that ideal life in our heads, and keep working towards it, we dont have to get on the crazy drama train. Maybe we could get on the crazy fun exciting train sometimes.
We can try an experiment. If there is a disagreement in a community, lets just stop arguing and start drawing your vision, or everyone go outside and start sledgehammering the asphalt, paint that room, dig that garden, or sing....cause I dont think fighting is in anyones vision.

joy

what brings me joy?

when I have theme songs running thru my head for different events or moments in life,
ruly mobs, (rather than unruly)
irises and daffodils ... and most flowers,
hugs,
Ama coming up with every possible way to wear my bellydancing scarf,
pink and purple,
rollerskating,
rollerskating parties with my friends,
good froth on a mocha,
snuggling,
taking silly pictures,
my cool new room,
slumber parties,
when people "get" me,
love,
hot springs,
being with people and not being expected to "do" anything
flashmobs,
watching people have fun,
planning what karaoke song I am going to sing, even if I dont actually sing,
harvesting, building, cleaning and cooking with people,
listening and being heard,
living IN town!
running into friends when I am out and about,
having a shared vision with people!